Sex after surgery

Some people heal nicely and have no problems with their pouch.  Others get a lot of anal soreness which can be a huge turnoff.  At least for me, when I'm in pain I don't feel very sexy, and I don't want anything poking around near that sore anus.  Of course, once you have no colon, anal penetration could be dangerous as the small intestine isn't stretchy like the colon.  If your sex drive is still pretty intact, you'll probably be the same after you heal.  I lost mine early due to chemotherapy messing around with my hormones and HRT didn't really bring it back, it just got rid of the worst symptoms.

Anal isn't a problem for me, don't have any interest in that, but my husband and I do have a very active sex life, and I would hate to see that suffer. I know the rectum helps support the vaginal wall, so that is the part that worries me, and is making it hard to decide between which surgery to have.

I appreciate you advice. I hope things improve for you.

I had my surgeries done as a teenager and don't have any comparison to what sex was like pre-j-pouch, but I did have trouble with discomfort once I became sexually active. After many years, I ended up going to women's health physical therapist, and she was able to identify exactly which muscle was overly tense and fix the problem. The difference was night and day, and I haven't had any issues with pain or discomfort during sex in the years since. SO, all that to say, it's possible that you'll experience trouble with comfort during sex, but help is definitely available and don't wait to get it! Best of luck with everything!

Haven’t been on this site for awhile, but I have had my J pouch for 34 years and I am now 57 ….seeing a physical therapist that specializes in the pelvic floor is so helpful especially post menopause.  Most hospital based physical therapy departments have people that specialize.