Short rant

What??? This does not make sense given her reason. How comfortable do you feel delving further into her explanation? Could it be scent of output because mine could make your hair stand on end. But that is neither here nor there. You are a competent, talented, impressive, making a difference in young lives kind of person. Do let her make you feel any less. Boy, having a healthy digestive system can really make someone out of touch with the rest of us! 

I meant do NOT let her....!

that deserves a scream out loud and poop left outside her door and lit aflame type reaction. how rude of the directrice. keep your chin up. don't let her win by mortifying you.

Just ask her why she would think it's you. If she isn't familiar with the intricacies of your output and is just making a guess as to who the toilet clogger is, maybe she needs to be educated. But nor have you posted what the dynamics of your relationship are or whether it really matters if you don't use a bathroom you never or rarely venture into.

Quite frankly the answer you gave likely sounded like an admission to her in all likelihood. 

Situations like these have come up in various office buildings I have worked at and the protocol for handling it is always the same, to post a sign over the toilet as to what not to put in it, rather than bar someone from using it. But if you are staff you get to use staff toilets- if you aren't you don't get to use them. Or so I would think.If on the other hand you are using some  handicap privilege to access toilets you otherwise wouldn't have access to, others may have complained.  This is all just speculation on my part because I don't know what all the facts are. I know that I have asked for and received accommodations as far as bathroom privileges when I had UC from various schools I attended. It's less of an issue since I got a J Pouch. Anyway good luck with it. I would have handled the situation differently but I don't walk in your shoes-plus I don't generally react very well in such situations when they arise. Such as the other night when my condominium neighbor parked her car in my guest parking spot. I am a speak his mind kind of guy for better or worse, but I think it can be worse in some situations.

It appears that someone higher up on the food chain needs to give the directrice more work if she is spending time monitoring who is using the bathroom and what goes on in there.  We all know that our Sharon is not the one plugging up the john and such an acquisition is totally out of order.  Perhaps someone could place a plunger in the bathroom for use by whoever is committing the offending act.

This is France and I am a Piece worker meaing I do not have tenure or a long term contract but only semester to semester (that is the conditon of 90% of all teachers here in post High School education) so I can be dropped in a minute.

I am a good teacher and the kids love me (to the extent that a student can love a teacher)...but this is rediculous...I have gone there twice and found it clogged (there are 2...that face directly into the office and the coffee corner as if they were in a house...no antichamber)...and I only work there Tues and Thrus...so either morning it cannot be me. It is just that I am always the first one there...

I don't want to turn this into a thing...so I won't use it (the semester is almost over anyway and we are moving sites) with the hope that it cloggs agian without me being present...

I am mad. If I had been tenured they could not say or do that but I have no status...or power. This just brings up all sorts of pain and bad feelings.

I shouldn't care but I do.

Sharon

im sorry Sharon. we all feel your pain, your anger. its enough that we spend any time visiting the loo to have it highlighted as an accusation is only more offensive, uncomfortable.

the irony of course is that the clogged toilet is a fear many of us have faced but to be slapped with an unwarranted accusation, a brown letter if you will is inherently inhumane and creates all kinds of ill will, poor feelings etc.

I guess given the uncomfortable lack of tenure/position and the proximity of the end of the year, perhaps the better path is to move on and away. distance yourself from the unworthy and unfeeling accusers.

keep your head high and imagine a fiery poo bag lit on the directrice's doorstep. hopefully that might bring a smile to your visage, turning that frown upside down.

Thanks guys, 

I agree that they may be using the clogging of the toilet as an excuse for something else that is bothering them...but I have never had a complaint about noise or odour from any employer or roommate or hubby...I have had my pouch for 36yrs...I should know by now if it is a problem...so...I will shut up and take it.

My last day is tomorrow.

Who knows if I will be taken back next year (the annual anguish of not knowing if I have classes or not for the coming year) and I will deal with whatever comes...

(but I like the flamming bag of poop idea....thanks)

Sharon

Some people..good grief.  I hope you do come back and teach.  Keep us posted. 

The Commencement ceremony is tomorrow night for my graduating class and I have asked hubby to join me...I do not have to courage to go alone (and it is very far away)...I finally told him what was said and how much it is hurting/bothering me...he was furious. And indignant.

My best friend who is in the employee defence business told me that I should meet with her face to face (in front of a witness), have it out, explain that biologically she is accusing the wrong person and then ask for a public excuse and explanation.

She says that it was defamatory, that I was accused and sanctionned without the possibility to defend myself and that it is highly ileagle to 'forbid' someone from using the washroom!

I just want to write a letter telling her she has accused a handicapped person of the one thing that is physically impossible. Attach a letter from my surgeon saying why.

I hate that this hurts 

Sharon

absolutely outrageous situation.  you are on the high road, which usually isn't crowded, so have faith in yourself.  if it were i, which is different than you, i would approach her and request that we re-visit our conversation.  in no way make it personal and push the problem off onto some other situation, such as the plumbing being poor because it is an old building (perhaps that is the situation.)   i would explain that i think there are some misunderstandings, that i have appreciated using the staff toilet because of my handicap, that i would be willing to have a plumber come in to correct the problem, or something on that order.  remember to deflect it away from her and nothing personal, other than mentioning that you have a gi handicap (i usually keep it simple and say that i have the gi system from hell.)

then again it is the end of the year, but i'm assuming your contract will be renewed.  would be better to get it settled now, if for no better reason that you don't fume over it for the summer.  good luck!!  janet

As I mentioned earlier in the thread I would have handled it in the manner suggested by your best friend, although I think asking for a public apology is a bit much and unnecessary..............however I think it should have been settled in that manner immediately.  From what you said your original post, it sounds like you made statements to her consistent with an admission of the alleged conduct.  One of the first things I learned in first year of law school contracts class is that silence or words other than a denial are often deemed to be an acceptance or an admission of a statement when the circumstances are such that one would be expected to offer a denial.......anyway you are not in court on this one, so it really only matters in her mind.  It's likely that you are not a confrontational person and I have many clients who assiduously avoid conflict and confrontation, and come to me because they couldn't communicate, directly and in person, something that in their minds would have created a confrontation.  But then I get hired to do it for them.  Virtually all of the business litigation matters I have right now resulted when direct communication of this nature didn't happen when it should have.  I understand that a lot of clients do not want to behave in a manner that is viewed as litigious, but at the same time, many situations in our lives (including most importantly for us on this board, medical situations and interactions with doctors), require a person to be his or her own best advocate.  I have had countless conversations with personal injury clients who articulate symptoms and issues that are nowhere discussed in their medical records, and when I ask them about that, they don't really have a good answer on why that is the case.  Stand up for yourself, and speak your mind, and these situations can be defused quickly.  Anyway I know the relationship and job status complicate matters somewhat, so I hope you understand that I say all of the above just to give you background on my own feelings about dealing with similar disputes, although they are usually over money and property and not bathroom use.

I understand perfectly...I stated flat out that 'it was biologically impossible to be responsible for what she was accusing me of' and that my handicap precluded it...She shushed me and told me that I was forbidden access to the staff washroom from then on...no discussion possilbe (she is a steamroller)...

Tomorrow is the graduation ceremony...I am going to honor my students and hubby is joinning me for the very 1st time (yeah for hubby!)....not for the staff.

If I feel up to it (and if I can hold hubby's hand while doing it) I will confront her.

If not, I will hug 60 graduating kids that I love and move on.

Sharon (the woose)

Sharon

I am curious though. If you are forbidden to use the staff toilet, which toilet are you to use? Assuming you were clogging the toilet, why would clogging a different toilet be better? Or were you forbidden from any campus plumbing?

Jan 

use gallon sized zip-lock bags?  and, of course, take them home with you for disposal......

sharon  what happened at the graduation event?  did you speak with her?  how are you doing?  best wishes, janet

Hi guys,

Well I did go to graduation and hubby came with me. (I sort of clung to his hand and hid behind him til I saw all the kids...then l let go). She was there but she came and went and didn't come near me...(who was afraid of who)

The kid were great and the director of the school congratulated me on my good work. 

Hubby wanted me to say something but it was inappropriate to the circumstances so I smiled and ate. I  will talk to him at the teacher's confrence in June. 

No, she did not suggest alternate toilets nor solutions. I  want my tenure right now and will fight for it but if she causes me problems I will take it to the prud'homme which is a french board of review for this sort of thing. My handicapped status makes this a "case of jurisprudence " and thus I will push it!

If I get tenure then I will swallow it and bide my time.

I had the occlusion 2 days later and suddenly I had other things to worry about...am on vacation now in an all inclusive and am living off of full fluids...can't risk another occlusion while out if the country...at least they have great yohurt here!

Sharon 

Enjoy your trip - as much as you can.  You deserve it and you work so hard for it!

Enjoy your all-inclusive, Sharon!

So far so good.  I have 2 hours of aqua gym  in ice water every morning  followed by rest, soup and tea for lunch, a nap and then 2 hrs of physiotherapy in hot water  and massage (torture)...today I walked a mile with no limp and no cane.

I have 10 days of this...my gift to myself (and hubby) . I need to get past the flare and get mobility back in my hips. 

My pouch is doing fine but the occlusion site is iffy. It aches. I massage it while in the jacuzzi and try to unknot the area but it is stiff and sore.  If I eat solids it feels like an hour glass... (sort of like a lapband in the wrong place.  

I know that I cannot break up the adhesions myself butthe massaging does help.

For now this vacation feels like hard work but it is worth it.

Too bad I can't  eat the food...it looks amazing! 

Sharon