Preparing for my daughter's 1st surgery

Hi Jeaneen,

Wow, 11...so young and so unfair. At least they caught it early.

I am supposing that they are going to give her an outside bag at first so she will have an ileo for a while...not usually too long for the young kids...They heal quickly.

What does she need with her in the hospital? Friends. Best friends. Girlfriends who will squeel and squirm at the sight of the bag and then laugh at it with her (not at her!)...she needs tons of normal.

Favorite bathrobe, nighty, stuffed animal and blankey.

Perfume for the bed, air and pouch...(those smells really get to those little noses)...I used to put a drop of my favorite perfume on my wrist and sniff it constantly in the hospital...it calmed my stress (now they call it aroma therapy...) 

The obvious music, cell phone, laptop stocked with her favorite series, movies, games etc.

Those hospital blue pads for her bed at home to protect it (a waterproof matress pad goes a long way to saving you on a new mattress too), some old towels that you can put down directly under her too (saves on changing the sheets constantly).

Leggings in dark colours, baggy tops, sweat pants...

Favorite foods to sip, slurp or gulp (she may not want to eat at first...Don't push it...make sure that you have some soups (beware of dehydration...canned soups are great to fight it...Especially chicken noodle or rice and tomato soup)...

Gummy bears! No contest...my favorite goodie...and ice creams, flans, puddings, (if she does not get her appetite back try baby food!).

And lots of mommy love!

(I figure at this point she knows that she has got the best mom in the world)

Sharon

ps...the real question is what do You need at the hospital? A support group of friends and family there to hold your hand and give you a shoulder to cry on.

Do not neglect yourself through all of this...she needs you so don't forget to eat, get exercise and some rest.

S

 

everything sharon said is spot on!!  I wish this forum had been around when I had my surgery, it's so informative and can be very comforting when u feel stressed.  Best wishes for a flawless surgery and complication-free recovery

Ditto on the mattress pad in case of a major leak at night. I came close.

Lots of loose clothing-robes, sweats.....

There have been threads on recommendations on what to bring to the hospital. Try to search for them. Some have lots of recommendations-more than I can remember.

Stock up on chicken, rice, low-fiber foods. I had gotten a lot of soup, but it went straight to the pouch and created too many leaks.

Jeff

My husband uses overnight pads(think ultrathin Stayfree with wings) to also help with leakage at night.

Best wishes.  Somehow it seems like the younger ones bounce back pretty quickly!  

Hi Jeaneen, I had j pouch surgery 16 years ago when I was 20. I was scared to death but what got me through the tough process was my incredible mom. She was by my side the entire time both at the hospital and home recovering. That is the best thing you can offer her, your presence. I bounced and healed very quickly. Youth is on her side! Good luck and stay strong for her.

Hello, everyone.  

 

I just wanted to take a moment and thank each of you for your kind words, advice, suggestion and personal insight.  It means so much to me that you took the time to read my question and respond.  It's comforting and calming to have some ideas of what to expect and how I can help my daughter through this.  

Good luck...I know that the date is fast coming upon you...can you take her out for a 'girls day' before she is hospitalized?

Maybe a shopping spree for slightly large clothes, a new haircut or some really comphy p.js?

A couple hours of normal out with mom for a cool moment of girl talk couldn't hurt (maybe a mani-pedi with her, you  and a girlfriend (transparent on her nails...anesthesiologist oblige!)

Just a thought...

ps. my favorite and best memory  post op was when my mom ordered me my first 'solid' meal in the hospital...it was lasagna from Pizza-Pizza (soft food, easy to eat!)

Sharon

Hi, Sharon.

Thanks for your message with all your great ideas.  Yes, we did have a shopping day with grandma to get some comfortable pants, sweatshirts, socks.  She also got two new robes and some matching pj's and comfy socks.  Grandma took her to Barnes and Noble and she got three new books to read when she feels up to it.  This weekend she and her best friend got a mani-pedi which was fun.

I'm not ready for today...I wish I had one more day with just the two of us...

Wonderful news! At least she has some memories of "girl-time weekend" to hold her through the worse part of this...

Soon you will be counting the days past and not the days up-to.

Almost over! I hope that everything goes well today.

Give her a cyber hug from me and I am sending ne to you too.

Sharon

Thinking of you today. Hope the surgery went well. I was diagnosed with FAP at 14. That was almost 40 years ago! I didn't have my surgery until 20 years ago. I put it off as long as possible. I inherited it from my father and my daughter just had the same surgery this year. She had it in one step Laparoscopically. It is amazing how much science advances! She is 22 and got right back in the swing of things after about a month.

I must say, having her friends visit in the hospital was amazing! Good friends can really lift her spirits. Please contact me if you need a shoulder or she wants to talk with my daughter. We are both here for you guys.

Wow, I just saw this and have misty eyes (and I seldom do)   My note comes after today's surgery so I can only offer post-op thoughts to add to the pre-op ones that came from such wonderful people.   First, I hope and trust that the surgery went well.  Second, I imagine that your daughter will have some emotional ups and downs no matter how upbeat she seems.  It may help for her to know that lots of youngsters go through this and most have done fine.   Adversity builds character and given that she "sounds" like one with a lot of it already, this challenge will just add to it.    One problem I had right after surgery was my well-meaning wife trying to protect me too much from friends, when I really wanted to see them.   My surgeon finally told her that I would not die from being tired so let him (me) determine when I was up to having company.  That helped my recovery.  I travel a lot for business and to take "anti-mess" protection with me.   (bed pads, old towels, personal pads, etc.)  I keep discreet emergency kits in both cars and my travel gear so if I have an accident I can quietly recover, and keep my dignity intact.)  Something else you might consider is suggesting that your daughter begin to act as an on-line mentor to other kids who will go through this.  I gave this advice to a fellow recently on a different health issue and he said it turned him from victim to advocate and improved his overall outlook.   If this interests her, I'm not sure how to set it up but others in this post may have ideas.  Finally, as was mentioned in an earlier post, please take care of yourself too.  It's too easy and understandable for caregivers to neglect themselves and that doesn't help anyone.    

Hello everyone.

Sorry I didn't update yesterday after Marinda's surgery.  It was longer than we had expected (7.5 hours) due to some scar tissue from a previous appendectomy and an issue with a blood vessel being long enough to reach far down into her pelvis where her anastomosis is.  But thankful for an amazing surgeon.

I broke down when I saw her in recovery and could clearly see her pleading eyes and how much pain she was in.  But she fought so tough and made it through.

She got to her room finally about 11 hours after our initial arrival.  I was shocked when she said she had to pee and wanted to get up and walk to the bathroom.  Even though she had a catheter, the nurses helped her and were in disbelief that she sat up, stood up and walked to the bathroom.

Overnight was a little rough with belly and bottom pain along with the vitals checks and alarms going off on her pain pump and iv.  But the nurses were great and kept her as comfortable as possible.

This morning she has already gone for two walks, sat in the recliner and is resting now.  Oh and had some apple juice!

I cannot extend enough thanks to each of you for your caring thoughts, warm words of encouragement and sharing your personal stories and suggestions.  It is comforting and helps me to understand what she may be feeling and going through and how I can best assist her through this process.

Hugs and blessings to all of you!  You're all in my thoughts!

Jeaneen

Very encouraging news!

What an amazing daughter you have!  Great attitude!  Best wishes for continued positive experiences!

Fabulous news...She is so strong.

Sounds like she is doing just great...now for the healing.

How are you holding up? Get some rest now that the worst part is over...get yourself a good book and read yourself to sleep beside her bed (you are probably not going home to sleep...) put your feet up onto the edge of the bed, close those eyes and believe that she in now going to have a much better life.

Give her hugs from us all...

Sharon