Brenda, I know how you feel. I was so scared to get my colon removed and I had no choice but to have the surgeries. Well, it was either the surgeries or get colon cancer. Being only 24, it's a lot to take in because the colon is a major organ.I didn't want to get the surgery though my life before it wasn't too bad. Well other then having ibs and not being able to keep food in me. There have been times I wanted my colon back, but obviously that wouldn't work out well. We just gotta remember it will get better and the surgeries are worth it. Never give because God gives his strongest soldiers the hardest battles. It also helps to have good caring people to talk to because for me talking about it helps me feel better. Plus it's bad to hold things in.When I had my ileostomy, I named it Erica jr lol.
Thank you Sharon and Erica�� My kids named my stoma Davey Jones after the Pirates of the Caribbean character because they think it makes noises like his face tentacle things. Thanks for the suggestion of having my little ones draw pictures of what they think of my baby pouch. And yes it does act just like a baby very unpredictable but I can finally laugh at my self now when Davey decides to be noisy. I was fearing the change and still am a little but then I remember that it will just be a new life style change and I was giving a second life to allow me to be here and watch my babies grow and meet new friends who are very supportive through these forums. Erica you are correct God does give his strongest soldiers the hardest battles and I'm sure his intentions are for us to be helpful to others that face the same battles so we don't feel alone. 24 is a young age to have your colon removed but I totally get you I'm 37 and being told I had colon cancer felt like the floor was pulled beneath me and world got turned upside down. I have a very supportive husband, family and friends yet no one to relate to and understand what I was going through until I found you guys in this forum which has been a blessing on its own. Thank you for the encouraging words and I will continue looking forward to life get and get healthier so I can have my second surgery and continue my journey!
You are a true champion....
I do not 'talk about God' much on this forum...firstly it is public and that seems to be a no-no these days. Secondly, I respect the beliefs of others who may not have the same point of view as I have on the subject...But, and here is the big but...God helps. Whatever the vision of God or your name for him (or her) you feel comforted by his presence in times of pain and sorrow.
He was a great comfort to me on those very long nights in the hospital pre and post-op as a kid (long before they allowed parents to stay with their child...The loneliness could really terrify you)...I took comfort in knowing that there was something out there that was bigger, stronger, and better and that there was a 'plan'...I won't preach but sometimes that is what we really need...To feel small and allow someone else to take control of the wheel for a while...to trust that things will turn out for the best.
When asked why things always happened to me, I used to say that I was strong and that I could shoulder the burdens that others could not, so God, gave me theirs...(I was around 9 at the time)...I still believe that today...
So, I trust that you are strong, that you will get through this and that there is, well, a plan...
And that it is time to allow those around you to help. Yes, let them help. Teach the little ones how to help in little things....let them feel important and useful in your healing process...Whether it is bringing you something that you need, setting the table or pour cereal for the smaller ones, make them feel like that are actors in your recovery...it will be so much less frightening for them that way...They will feel less powerless and lost...and you will be so proud of them.
By the way, No one who has not been on this journey can understand it.
No more than a man can understand childbirth or periods. He can sympathize, empathize but he cannot understand it. That goes for friends too...if you have not walked this path, then you cannot say, 'I understand'...so do not expect them to.
I lost a lot of friends along the way...And am very grateful that I did...Because the ones that are still there are precious, and here to stay.
Sharon