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So at my office, we have a two-stall women's restroom and a private gender-neutral bathroom downstairs and several other marked and unmarked bathrooms upstairs. Over the past few weeks, I've noticed a male coworker getting frustrated when I'm in the gender-neutral/private bathroom downstairs. Since my bathroom visits are longer and loud I feel much more comfortable in the private bathroom.

Today said male coworker waited outside the bathroom for me. He told me there was a "ladies' restroom right there." I simply replied that I have a medical issue and the private bathroom is easier for me. He then acted incredibly frustrated and walked past me.

My blood is boiling!

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I agree, he has his own issues.  Maybe he is jealous?  Doubtful if he knew what us j-pouchers have been through.  If he does it again perhaps he would care for a blow by blow account of why you feel more comfortable in the private washroom. Perhaps you could ask him why it is important to him that the gender neutral washroom remain vacant?

I know for darn sure that I would choose the private facilities every single time if I had that luxury.  Keep your head held high and your rights at the forefront.

I understand exactly how you feel. This has always been an issue for me too and having to time my washroom breaks when I hope no one is there. Besides monitoring you, why is he at the gender neutral washroom and not at the men's washroom? I'm so thankful that I have just retired and that anxiety is gone...with the exceptions of outings. If he continues consider going to HR with this.

I've had people make snarky comments at bars and breweries and I'll usually reply back with a comment of my own, something along the lines of "is there a problem?" Not in an aggressive tone, but in a serious one. I am not a confrontational person in any regard, but given it's a sensitive topic I do take a bit of offense. Plus, it's a personal thing - weird to comment on.

Obviously in the workplace you want to avoid escalating things. I agree with what others have said about mentioning that there's a men's restroom for use as well. I'm not one to tattle either, but if this persists, maybe think of speaking to HR.

I'm glad I'm retired.

Don't have to deal with people at work in any form.

Sorry this person may have issues also. 

I had plenty of issues before any surgery was done.

But I was never pestered by my fellow employees.

They knew my issues.  I wa never embarrassed by them. So they knew before and after my surgeries.

Keep using the bathroom you are using. Tough Tata if he needs it. He can wait or use the men's room.


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