Welcome to the group! This is an excellent place to get information from “veterans” who have had experiences similar to yours and who may offer suggestions to help your pouch behave better for you. I suggest that you enter a post in the General Discussion section of this board that describes the problems you are experiencing and watch for the responses that will be forthcoming. Your problems are not uncommon for J pouchers and many existing posts should also be helpful.
J pouch removal is a major operation, so you should try to reduce your current problems before deciding to say good bye to your pouch. In addition to an ileostomy, there are two procedures available that avoid an external bag, the K pouch and closely related BCIR (which I now have after a failed J pouch). You can get lots of information online about all 3 alternatives. You may want to check out the BCIR program website (www.bcir.com) for information on that procedure and a seminar to be held in Dallas on December 9. Hang in there and best of luck!