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My uncle had Fap...he survive colorectal cancer, a proctor colectomy with pouch creation and went on to a full recovery...then at the 5yr mark they found mets in the liver and lungs.

He had half of his liver removed, chemo agian for the mets and survived that too. 

Became diabetic with 85% kidney malfunction, sacroilitis and a S-load of other complications. 

As he said, they gave him 3 months to live 15 yrs ago...since then he burried 3 nephrologists...

They put the dialysis shunt in his arm over 2 yrs ago...never used it.

He passed on last week from an infection. Yup, an infection. In 24hrs he was gone.

He survived it all and was taken by something so insignificant and stupid...I am heart broken...he was my hero, my idol and the one I turned to for help, support and love...I now feel lost and alone.

He never complained in spite of the pain and torture and always had a joke or a funny story to tell. He made me laugh when I wanted to cry.

I only hope that I can live up to his legacy.

This has been a sh-tty month, year, decade...and I know that it will get better one day but for now I am going to mourn and cry for a great man.

I am posting the poem that I wrote for him when I heard about his passing...please excuse me for the extreme personal aspect of this post...only you can understand.


Once upon a time, a long long time ago

I met a tall man, a man so tall that his dreams touched the sky

Once upon a time, a long long time ago I met a strong man,

So strong that his shoulders could carry the weight of the world and he could still stand tall.

Once upon a time, a long long time ago I met a wise man,

So wise was he that his council filled the galaxies with millions of stars of his wisdom.

Once upon a time, a long long time ago

I met a generous man, so generous that he knew how to give before those in need needed to ask.

Once upon a time, a long long time ago

I met a rich man, so rich was he that he filled the hands and souls of all of those in need with never a thought for himself.

Once upon a time, a long long time ago

I met a loving man, so loving was he that his heart filled the oceans and overflowed them with his goodness and kindness and love.

Once upon a time, a long long time ago I met a man with eyes so kind and blue that they brought peace to this war torn earth.

Once upon a time, a long long time ago

I met a man with hair made of silver with which he fed the poor and calmed the weary

Once upon a time, not but just a few hours ago

God reached down and took that man from us.

We wept like bereft children who have lost their father

And screamed at God, “Why? Why did you take him so soon from us? How could you be so cruel?”

And God answered, “He was not yours but on loan, to help you and guide you through the darkest nights and show you what love is and how to be generous and kind in the face of horrors and terrors. How to build a life from nothing and raise a family on laughter and smiles. But he belongs to me not you. This world is falling apart and I need his council and guidance now more than ever.”

And so he sits by the right hand of God, sharing a joke and a nosh and story of where he has been and what he has done…and the world will be a better place now that God finally has someone to talk to.

Good bye my dearest Arnold….please help him to set this world right for you are the only one who can do it.


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So sorry for your loss Sharon. I know that frustration. My mother in law was fighting cancer and doing well but contracted c diff infection and died from complications of that infection. We all felt so helpless and angry that she passed from something that may have been totally avoided. Prayers for you, your family and your uncle. 

Thank you all for your kind wishes,

I have just gotten home after flying out to be with my family (such a wonderful word: Family, I had nearly forgotton). 

I realise that sometimes we need to follow our hearts and not our heads or our pocket books...hubby still being in rehab for a broken ankle & elbow and me feeling guilty for abandoning him plus our travel budget just got blown for the year...I had to go...And I did good.

I think that those who gave us so much and asked for nothing in return other than to see us grow and prosper deserve our love and tears when they leave us.

Many of the people that I saw there had not seen me in over 33yrs prior to my running away to France...some were shocked to see me (alive?) after all of my surgeries and honestly thought that I had died

Many were profoundly touched at his passing and shared in the mourning...

My uncle had personally sent for 2 different surgeons to take a look at me when I was a from Russia and one from Tel Aviv try to operate and fix the problem...finally when I had found Dr G at Duke who did the Gracillis muscle flaps he financed most of it...not to mention being there for all of the k pouch surgeries and even flying me home when things went to pot...while simultaneously dealing with FAP, colon cancer etc...

This world will be a poorer place without him but I am so grateful that he had lived and touched my life.



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