I found this online (not something I do very often but...it seemed appropriate)
I sort of nodded all the way through while reading it.
OH, wow, this is so accurate. I know people mean well, but their words hurt. And the guilt. The GUILT! I found that sometimes it helped to just come out and say,"Yes, in order to spend the day with my family at the beach in eighty five degree weather, I ate and drank nothing all day and spent the next three days in the house." Sometimes said this...when I couldn't take it anymore and was hurt and guilty and terrified. It does stop them in their tracks but also helps them to consider the impact of their words. Thanks for sharing, Sharon.
I love the weight gain and weight loss ones...either I am too fat and they tell me that I am letting myself go or too thin and being told that I don't know how to eat! Tired means that I must be doing something I shouldn't (like going out dancing til 3am?) ...I am not sure but some days I just want a neon sign that I can turn on and off that flashes my condition of the day ...ouuupss...that is facebook!
Well... I have never had anyone comment on my UC.
My family understood. No weird comments. In fact they would just treat me normal even though they knew I was not.
Not that the didn't know. My friends... Co workers... But if they asked I would explain to them what it was and how lucky they are to be "normal". And that I would not wish this on my worst enemy..... Well.. If it was a bad person I would... Lol.
But.... I say what's on my mind. A big flaw of mine.... And if someone would've asked.. Said one of those I would explain to em... In detail what was going on.
If I did that they would never ask again.
Amusing. Yet I don't recall any of those comments to be bothersome for me. Many people just feel compelled to comment in these odd ways, rather than just ask you how you are doing. I had quite a few folks act all alarmed that I did something so "drastic" as having a colectomy, as if it was not a well thought out choice. I imagine women who have mastectomies get plenty of "advice" from well meaning people.
I found it sort of great that this things is going 'mainstream' and that it incites a dialogue...sort of bringing the whole thing out of the closet.