I'm sorry you are having such a hard time. I don't think I got the total low down on what life without a colon and with a j pouch would be like from my surgeon or my GI either. I don't think someone who has not walked the walk would know how bad the butt burn is or how painful the gas can get for us. Alot of what some of us go through seems to be three fold what a people that still have colons deal with on a daily basis. I was very lucky because I found this site when my GI first told me that having my colon removed was the only way I was going to get well again, and that I'd be a good candidate for a j pouch. I guess we need to advocate for ourselves and do the research. Our lives are different now, but mine at least is far from bad. I feel much better on my worst day now than on my best day with UC. Just keep your chin up and ask questions of these wonderful people on this site and they will help you find the answers you need. Good luck, I hope you things start looking up for you.