Many years ago I was mad about the man who much later became my best friend. He came from a huge family and wanted lots of kids. I already knew that my health and K pouch caboshed that possibility.
For years we suffered trying hard to keep the relationship friendly and not romantic but in the end, we gave in. His family adores me but I was not a good candidate for wife and mother...too sick, too fragile, sterile...so we called it quits and he married someone else. A healthy woman who gave him a beautiful son.
I married a divorced father of 2 who was a close family friend. His family also thought that I was not good enough due to my health.
Fast forward 20 yrs...My best friends ex-wife was a hypocondriac...alwasy sick and never available to do things that he wanted to be doing...his new girlfriend of 12yrs is worse, back pain, migraines, and a dozen other medical problems... she is either sick, convalescing or planning her next disease.
We have a medical issue. Yes, it is time-consuming, energy eating and life spoiling but we do more with the little that we have than most 'healthy' people do. We fight the good fight and make the best of a horrible situation, we sacrifice our own lives for others because we do not feel 'worthy enough' due to our disease.
Guess what? We are more than just worthy, we are superhuman beings...Superieur in every single way. Warriors and fighters who hide our pain so that others do not suffer...would they be willing to do the same? We work and carry our friends and families and give love and council even when in hospital beds, we hold their hands and heads when ill and do so because we possess empathy and compassion, things that are in a great shortage in this world.
So if your young man is too innocent/naive or inexperienced to see what he has got and too stupid to understand that you are the healthy one but your body does not know it yet...then you may choose to change him for a 'healthier' model!
Your disease doe not define you, never allow others to define you by it either.
Sharon
p.s. Years later my best friend's family lamented that we had never wed...that he would have been better off with me. His mom and I still love each other and she cries at the mistake that the family made when they 'rejected me'.
I, on the other hand, realize that I dodged a bullet...