Sharon, I'm so sorry for all your pain. I can't even to imagine having to live with it. I watch my son suffer as well. It breaks my heart. I told him the other day that he was my superhero. he smiled and said thanks. To add to his misery is that he has Aspergers. So he has had more than his fair share of struggles. He never had a friend until last year, his very first friend, someone who actually lives close by, not an Internet friend. I have to say it is saving me thousands in Therpy! And his attitude after this last surgery is amazing g. I can't believe its the same person. You need to laugh, get out of the house and find something funny. I don't watch much TV but what I do watch are the medical shows and I like NCIS, Law and Order. But the Batchelor is my guilty pleasure. The shows on USA are great like Suits, and oh, I love Scandel. I just found a neat show on E called the Royals. I love anything to with England and the Royal family. This is totally fiction, but good. Like a modern day Dynasty. But my point is, don't give up. Never give up. i had a shitty childhood, abousive mother, no father. I married my mother, verbally absive husband and my darling son, too. It was a Pete and repeat situation. My point is we all have something. Whether we see it or not, we all have crap in our lives. I used to tell this to Jeffrey every day whenhe would come home crying From school. Giving up is not an option. Menopause is a real bi***. I'VE been having hot flashes for over 12 years. I'm on HRT even though I'm at a 50% breast cancer risk.