Since I went through menopause in stages I didn't need HRT. I had my uterus removed and kept my ovaries for another 15 years until my colon was removed. My ovaries had quit working, according to testing, so the only thing left they could give me was cancer I had them removed along with my colon. It's like - how many unnecessary body parts can we get rid of, appendix and ovaries went with my colon. (Technically the appendix is art of the large intestine so would have gone anyway. More fun to think of it is an overhaul of all abdominal.) Plus I read somewhere that body fat produces estrogen and I had plenty of that. I'm still down 55 pounds from before the j-pouch surgeries.
One of my friends is an OBGYN and she says the cancer risk is less than that of getting in a plane or car accident. I don't remember which. It sounds like a lot of risk to me as I'm one of the unlucky ones to get cuffitis I don't accept any risk I don't have to anymore. BUT I know many that just needed to go on HRT for a short duration and not indefinitely. Menopause causes some to have insomnia and you know the other problems. For example, instead of taking HRT a sleeping pill might be the way to go. Uncontrollable hot flashes are not going away if you sleep better. I have heard that OTC natural or whatever the safety claims are, HRT is difficult to manage as there is no oversight into the products strength - in the U.S.
I hope you get all the immediate help you can Sharon.