I don't have an experience to share, but I am also 39 and have been hoping to have my first child. My first surgery was an emergency surgery and I was quite sick, so the trauma thing resonated with me as well. (Fortunately, thanks to Cleveland Clinic, my following surgeries were nowhere near as traumatic, but no surgery is easy). I also had a twisted bowel at one point- I've been told childbirth is much easier than that experience.
Wishing you lots of luck and maybe we will both have easy journeys in the next year!
-Lina