skn69,
You are an amazing person with an amazing story! Thank you for sharing it with me. I seem to turn to this site in during my low times, looking for a glimmer of hope or some information I over looked. I am somewhat of a control freak and also a problem solver but I am not a medical professional. Diseases and the destruction that cause are completely out of our control. I have good days and bad days. My biggest struggle right now is finding a pouch system that works for me and stays in place with out leaking. changing a pouch three times in one day is too much. The location of my stoma was good when I was young but now that I am older I carry extra weight in that area and it is also the same site of my original stoma so there is a lot of scar tissue. I have a wound very close to the stoma on my skin that is not healing. Sometimes it hits me and I just don't want to do this anymore but its not like I have a choice. Its easy for me to become self absorbed and my wife has been very understanding but has grown weary of that and needs me to focus on her. I hear stories like yours and think to myself that I need to be grateful and remember that my surgery saved my life. I had a gift of living 28 years without many complications and thinking my UC was cured and then I found out that I didn't have UC but Crohn's disease. Only a few months ago I was living my life and enjoying it, now my bathroom is filled to the brim with medical supplies and medications and I have to get infusions and go to the doctor a lot mote than I want to. I am holding out hope that my fistula will heal and my j-pouch can be hooked up again but I know I need to mentally prepare myself for what comes next if it doesn't. Thank you for reaching out to encourage me and for sharing your story.