Hi there! Just wanted to say that I totally relate-- it's tough to find doctors who are familiar with women of childbearing age (I'm 32) who have j-pouches, and I personally don't know anyone else in real life who's in this position (though I know plenty are on here!) It can often seem like we're having to blaze our own trail, which is stressful. The only thing I can think of would be to ask about all the diagnostic/screening tools available so you can get as good an idea as possible of what your particular anatomy looks like. I'm not sure if you've already been trying naturally or not, but either way it may be helpful to gather that info. For me personally, upon comparing my ultrasound (which noted the location of my ovaries) and HSG (which noted the location of my tubes), it appeared that scar tissue had caused both to re-locate in my abdomen, and it looked unlikely that I would ever be able to naturally get an egg from my ovary to tube in order to conceive. (This was in 2016, and when I had an unrelated surgery last fall to remove an ovary, my surgeon told me that the adhesions around my ovaries were a huge mess and agreed that I wouldn't have been able to get pregnant on my own.)
I was able to pursue IVF shortly after the initial testing, which, thankfully, has been a smooth process for us. We've had two children already and are pregnant with a third! My pregnancies and deliveries have also, thankfully, been uncomplicated and I haven't experienced any issues with my pouch. Happy to chat more if you have any other questions while you navigate this process. Good luck!