Brenda, I know how you feel. I was so scared to get my colon removed and I had no choice but to have the surgeries. Well, it was either the surgeries or get colon cancer. Being only 24, it's a lot to take in because the colon is a major organ.I didn't want to get the surgery though my life before it wasn't too bad. Well other then having ibs and not being able to keep food in me. There have been times I wanted my colon back, but obviously that wouldn't work out well. We just gotta remember it will get better and the surgeries are worth it. Never give because God gives his strongest soldiers the hardest battles. It also helps to have good caring people to talk to because for me talking about it helps me feel better. Plus it's bad to hold things in.When I had my ileostomy, I named it Erica jr lol.