Paulin, I’m sorry to hear that you are having so much trouble with your pouch. I had an abnormally high frequency with mine plus recurrent high grade dysplasia in the anal cuff that made pouch removal necessary. I strongly did not want an ileostomy with its issues and was fortunate to get a BCIR. Like most people with these procedures, I enjoy a very good quality of life. I empty my pouch with a small plastic catheter at my convenience 4-5 times a day. I do not know if you have heard of this option (or the closely related K pouch), but these are available options that do not require having an outside bag. In some cases, a J pouch can be used to make a K pouch or BCIR. Please feel free to send me a PM if you have any questions.
Bill