I had my ileostomy for 9 years and other than a few minor appliance leakage issues, exhaustion and the odd accident during my sleep, I lead an active and fulfilling life; in the words of one of my Surgeons " I'd adapted well to life with an ileostomy" and I still chose to have a J Pouch.
My J Pouch was created June 2014 and my takedown surgery to reconnect was January 2015 and life without the colostomy is absolutely wonderful.
I don't know how things work where you are but maybe your Surgeon is applying undue pressure while you contemplate such a huge decision.
My bowel was removed back in 2005 due to UC, with the intention of reconnection 6 or 7 months later, that is, until pathology results revealed I had Crohn's rather than UC; at the time, most, if not all Hospitals within the UK would not perform reconnection surgery on a patient diagnosed with Crohn's.
So, as I was able to have a J pouch created after 9 years, I can't see why you must make such a huge decision in a matter of weeks.
Tell your surgeon, it's you and not he/she who will have to live with the results of such a decision; therefore, it shouldn't be taken lightly.
During my 9 years with the ileostomy, other than taking Loperamide to slow and thicken my output and Omeprazole for acid reflux, I was medication and flare up free, which kinda proved I didn't actually suffer from Crohn's.
I was re diagnosed with indeterminate Colitis; and therefore, qualified for J Pouch surgery.
Opting for a J pouch is the best decision I've ever made; although I'm male, body image was a huge reason as to why I disliked the colostomy.
A J pouch, is often regarded as the new normal and for myself; my new normal is 98% or normal.
I now use the toilet like everyone else, no supplies to be carried around or special wash routine, the only exception are the number of visits to the toilet during a day, which isn't an issue and so easy to accommodate;, there's never any urgency, leaks or accidents; life couldn't be better.
I require only 3-4 BM per day, never less than 2 and very very rarely more than 5, when it is, it's normally due to what I've ate.
Visits to the bathroom are hours and hours apart, thus appearing perfectly normal to work colleagues and those around and if necassary, can also be controlled by use of Loperamide, which I don't actually need, but I do notice a beneficial difference when taken.
No disturbed sleep and night time bathroom visits either, which can also be controlled by use of Loperamide.
As I said earlier, such a decision shouldn't be taken lightly; opt for the ileostomy but retain the rectal stump, this will provide time to recover and prepare for the next procedure.
If the surgeon who removed my bowel also removed my rectum at the same time, then I wouldn't have been able to have a J Pouch 9 years later.